When I was in law school and I was called on to explain a case my knees shook so bad I thought I would fall down. I practiced with friends and my mirror. I read books about performance and went to a performance coach who had also written a book about being calm when performing. I even went to a hypnotist, all to no avail. When I was called on by my law professors, my knees still shook, and I didn’t even know what I was saying. Anytime I had to stand up and talk, it was a small death for me. They say (and “They” know everything) that public speaking is the number one fear – even above the fear of snakes.
How did I get like this? Here’s a clue. My sister and I, as adults, were watching TV with my mother, and she would make comments like, “Look at that tie he’s wearing. Who did her hair? Her eyebrows sure look funny. Oh no, she’s singing off key!" As a child and an adult, I was terrified of being judged.
Despite my upbringing, one day I decided that I would no longer judge anyone, no matter what. As a result I stopped judging myself! And as an unexpected side benefit, my fear of public speaking and performing went with it. But, I’m still afraid of snakes, especially if they sneak up on me or . . . they might be under my bed!
Leave a Reply